4:30 In The Morning

It's 4:30 in the morning and I am awakened by a loud noise from the room above my room. It is pitch black. I guess I forgot to leave the television on, which is not something I usually do. I unwrap myself from the blue cover and begin to stare at the black ceiling that looks down upon me. I realize something - I am officially no longer in school. I am getting ready to walk out into the real world. It's funny, but I never really knew how I'd feel about being a college grad considering so few African American men graduate early or graduate period and the fact that I'm thinking about this stuff at the peak of morning before the sun rises from wherever it rests. For the past few months, I have been waiting on this moment and now that it's here and I feel kind of blah about it. I do not know if that's good or bad. I mean yes - I will get that nice and elegant looking degree but did I rush things. Was I so excited about getting out of here that I did not get to enjoy my senior year? Was that it? The black ceiling continues to look down at me. I am waiting on it to answer, but all I hear is the sound of my half-sleep voice. I turn the television on to get some sound going in the midst of silence. Silence and I have never been too close. We've dated, but always remained friends. Nothing more. The foolishness of an informerical catches my attention. You know the one about the Magic Blender or something like that. Another thing to send away 4 or 5 easy payments of $. The informerical was kinda interesting though. I have never actually sat down and watched an infomercial. I flip the channels to find nothing on and then I turn the television off. I let out a sigh, trying to interpret whether it's a sigh of relief or not. Relief that I made it through the last year of college. I glance out of the window and notice that the snow has stopped. The cars are burried in that white mush. The wind is blowing heavily. I can tell because the leaves on the ground are blowing all over the parking lot outside my window. I turn back and re-wrap myself in the covers and stare at the celing thinking about the accomplishment I've made. I turn on some music and continue thinking as the sun begins to peak through the blinds.

Life has many parts, I wonder about some.

Last songs to play...
311- Beautiful Disaster
Seether - Broken
Sia - Breathe Me
The Strokes - Juicebox
O.A.R. - Love & Memories
Coldplay - God Put A Smile On My Face